Live From New York
by jehc
Summary: Just a little companion to Ultimatum but can stand alone. I made up a fact about Presidents, I hope you'll just go with it! I have no idea if I will write anymore SNL pieces or if this is it. I tried to write the rap at the end but I failed maybe I'll try again in the future, who knows!


"Honey," Andrea Sachs-Priestly said to her wife as the drove to the theater for Miranda's appearance on Saturday Night Live, "I am a little concerned that you haven't studied your script at all."

"Don't be silly Andrea, I am playing me, answering questions as me. Considering that I have been me for over fifty years I see no need for a script or to rehearse."

"Oh Lord," Andrea thought to herself, "these folks will never know what hit them!"

The set looked like a news desk. Miranda was sitting beside Seth Meyers. The skit was a mock interview for the weekend update.

"Miranda, so glad you could make it."

Miranda nodded regally, "Thank you."

"I know you are often hounded by the gossip rags and you never respond. So tell me what would you like to say to those that call you 'the Devil in Prada'?"

Miranda put her hand to her mouth in a mock yawn and replied, "Let's make a deal." The audience laughed and Seth immediately knew he was in trouble, Miranda had gone off script.

"You are well known for being a perfectionist. How do you respond to the rumors that your entire staff is frightened of you?"

Miranda cocked her head in thought before she replied, "Emily isn't." There was a long pause while everyone waited for more then they chuckled when it didn't come.

"That's your response? Emily isn't?" Seth was reaching back for his imporv skills in order to keep up with the editor.

"Mm, I'll have to work on that. She might start a trend."

"I see and how do you answer to the rumors that if an assistant fails your request they disappear and are never seen again?"

"Well, they certainly aren't seen again at Runway, but I don't actually do away with them. There aren't enough places to hide all the bodies of which I am accused of disposing. I don't know how people would think I could accomplish that." She looked thoughtful and tapped her lips with her index finger. "Hmm that may explain why there was a homicide detective in the neighbor's yard while my new patio was poured."

Wide eyed Seth moved on to the next subject. "You have two daughters, twins." He looked at Miranda expectantly, hoping she would get back to the script which would now have her gushing about her children.

"Yes, my Prada heels with the red soles come in very handy with that."

Now Seth was totally at a loss. The audience, however, had quickly realized that Miranda had staged a coup. They were loving every minute of it. "Umm how is that?" Seth said hesitantly.

"It hides the blood from the head stomping I am compelled to do when my girls are mentioned by the media."

The audience laughed as Seth replied, "All-righty then, time for a subject change." He took a deep breath, "You are married." Miranda nodded and Seth continued. "She is a beautiful and much younger woman." Miranda cocked an eyebrow and waited. "How did your friends and family react to that?"

Miranda rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Any one who sent cards congratulating me on her adoption was removed from our Christmas list."

Seth laughed along with the audience. "There must be some problems inherent in such an age difference." He wiggled his eye brows dramatically.

Miranda gave a small smile as she replied, "Not really, as long as Andrea takes her vitamins she can keep up." The audience laughed hardily.

"Before we break for commercial I have to ask, is there any truth to the rumor that Miranda Priestly turns gay men straight?"

"Honestly Seth," Miranda said in an exasperated voice, "only in Valentino. They only jump the fence when I wear Valentino." The audience cheered and Miranda rolled her eyes smirking. "They jump right back over when I take it off." She paused until the laughter died down and continued, "It's been rather disappointing, actually."

At this point Seth just plain gave up. He put his head in his arms and lay them down on the desk. He was over come with laughter, it was a show out of control.

A young man in the audience was clearly not only a fan of Miranda and Runway but also a guy with some inside info. Since there seemed to be a pause in the action he yelled out. "Is it true that the chairman of Elias Clark forced you on this show to embarrass you?"

Miranda was surprised at the question but the answer came to her quickly. "That would be foolish, look at the amazing people who have appeared on this show. Think about it, every President since Gerald Ford has had at least a cameo. How could I possibly embarrass myself by joining such an exalted group?" As she said it Miranda realized it was true. Irv not only didn't win this little battle, he just lost the war. In a moment of surprised joy Miranda treated the world to rare and musical laugh accompanied by a full blown honest smile.

"Miranda," Seth said in awe as he studied her genuine smile, "it's not the Valentino. Honestly it's not." Miranda laughed again.

As they went to station break Seth announced, "Stay tuned, we will be right back for the first ever performance of the Fashionista rap."


End file.
